Liam’s Birth Story

Photo by Rayen Watanabe

On November 28th, 2023

I started feeling contractions in the morning. It was a feeling I had been waiting for months for. I had hiked Koko Head several days prior trying to get things moving. I was 39 weeks and so over being pregnant. I was excited to get my first contractions but also nervous. The contractions however didn’t pick up in frequency or power. I called to let Torey know what was happening and told my team at work that morning I’d be working from home. I called my OB’s office since I had a scheduled routine appointment that morning, and they’d let her know and be on stand by for possibly meeting me later at the hospital. Torey was supposed to work a job in Kapolei but decided to instead finished a job in town so he wouldn’t be too far away. I continued working from home, making sure to tie up any loose ends if I was to go on maternity leave in the next day or so.

Before coming home from work, Torey made a Costco stop. If we were going to go to the hospital, we wanted to come back home to a filled fridge and freezer. Side note, friends and family dropped off meals and groceries to us once we got home, for almost three weeks. Needless to say, our kitchen was filled and we were grateful for it.

I made sure we had our bags were ready and had Torey make sure the car seat was installed. We called our doula to let her know and that we’d call her know if anything more developed. We were home bodies for now and enjoyed just being the two of us together before we welcomed our little guy soon. All was calm for now.

The next day…November 29th.

My contractions had picked up in power and frequency early that morning. I let my team at work that I’d be out today. I had officially put my maternity leave notice on. That was a surreal moment. Torey was excited and kept checking on me and started helping me time the contractions. He called out from work and stayed home with me.

I began nesting a little bit more just to make sure everything was ready for baby to come home and for us to be at the hospital. I had to remember to also savor the last moments of being just Torey and I together. We settled in at home and watched Christmas movies together. It felt great being at home, it was the holidays (my favorite time of year), and we were cuddled up talking about this being our first year of marriage, about how surreal this was, and that soon, we’d have our baby home with us.

By evening, contractions were more frequent and powerful but not to the point yet of going to the hospital. But we felt like it was to the point of reaching out for help in navigating through the contractions and having extra labor support. We called our doula and she came over that evening. Once she came over, she monitored while Torey and I worked through contractions. I was laying on my side with Torey holding me close. She said that we were on the cusp of going into active labor but still in early labor and then asked, “Do you trust me?”. She suggested walking up hills and I was ready for it. Her and I would go walking and she said that as a team, Torey should rest because and eat as much now because later, he’d need to be in it with me.

My doula and I drove up the street near the mid base of Makiki hill on Ward. Walking up and down the hill and other side hill streets, contractions were definitely stronger but I kept walking and breathing through the pain. Walking downhill was actually way tougher.

I held my doula’s hand, squeezing it for balance and also for the pain of each wave of contraction. By the time we got back to the car, my contractions were lasting a minute long and closer together. We drove back to our neighborhood and stopped at SALT to walk around the block once more before heading up to our apartment to regroup.

When we came upstairs, we huddled about our next moves. Based on how I was managing the pain of the contractions, our doula was thinking that there might be some time before heading to the hospital, so she was going to go home for a quick rest before meeting us at the hospital later that night. She said “I think it’s your night tonight, but there still may be a little time before we go to the hospital.” I was okay with that, but I was sweaty and felt uncomfortable after walking all those hills, so I went to take a quick shower.

When I came out of the shower, Torey was talking to our doula about my pain threshold. He was telling her that I probably wasn’t giving the whole story when I was telling her how strong the contractions really were or showing like I needed the help I should be getting. He told her that they were probably strong but I manage pain well. She looked over at me and said, “oh okay, you’re one of those”. He gave an example of when I ran a half marathon and accidentally tripped at the base of Diamond Head, skidding across the pavement and popped back up with blood coming down my legs and hands and continuing the race, running up Diamond Head with people staring in concern. She planned to stay for 15 minutes to monitor me to see where my contractions were by then.

Halfway through the 15 minutes, I got up to pee, but instead of using the toilet, I used the shower. I know TMI, but every time I used the toilet, the pain of my contractions increased and they came more frequently, and I just wanted to pee with a little break with the shower hopefully able to help with the pain also. While in the shower, I was feeling pain in my bum and frequency of contractions were getting very close. This was something we learned in birth classes that I remembered was a big sign of when to know it’s “go time” and to get to the hospital if I wasn’t already there. I called our doula in and told her what was happening and she said it was time to head to the hospital.

The drive through the Pali I’ll never forget. It was painful and so uncomfortable.

The pressure on my bum was getting more intense. At one point, an ambulance was driving in the lane next to us and I wondered, “Am I about to have this baby on the Pali?”. But we made it to the hospital. Thankfully, our doula took my birth plan and called the hospital before we left home to let them know we were coming so my OB would be there. Once I got in the birth room, the nurses asked how I was doing. I told them frequency and length of contractions, how long it’s been going on, and then I mentioned pressure in my rear and their faces and response matched the “Ohhh okay” reply, and I knew we were close to showtime. My OB came in the room and did a cervix check to see where I was. I was 9 centimeters dilated. “A little bit of time left”, she said and she left the room, along with three other nurses.

It was just Torey, our doula, and one nurse. The nurse was bedside monitoring the screen and computer. Honestly, the room felt cold. Not physically cold, but the atmosphere didn’t feel like the warm, inviting environment I envisioned my labor to be. Torey started playing our playlist and laying hands praying over me and it changed the atmosphere.

Thank God for a praying husband and a set playlist.

The contractions were getting intense and all I could focus on was listening to cues from our doula and holding onto Torey’s hand while she helped with physical pain management. At one point, my body started making pushing movements and I was scared it was too soon to push so I nervously spoke out, “I feel like I need to push”, and the nurse calmed me “Yeah it’s okay, follow that feeling”. Once she said that, I went with my body’s cues. That feeling I’ll never forget. Just like how your body instinctively projects when you need to vomit, it was that same ejecting instinct but down there and on a whole ‘nother level. It was coming and going in waves, but with full force each time. I was on the bed laying on my side and then there was another feeling of pushing that came and I followed it, and suddenly I heard a gush of liquid come out of me. I was scared something wrong happened but then the nurse told me “You’re okay. That was your water. Baby’s been pushing with his head and now that it’s broken he’s coming down easier.” My water had never fully broke before coming to the hospital. It was leaking but it was definitely broken at this point.

I just kept focusing on what it felt like my body needed. Breathing deeply, I moved onto all fours and moved forward and back. I then moved side to side from my doula and the nurse’s cues from watching baby on the monitor as I kept moving and breathing.

All of this was happening and I was holding onto Torey for dear life.

Torey started praying out loud. Our doula prayed out loud. I was clinging to Torey’s back while he draped his arms over my shoulders and our heads touching one another while he just kept praying and encouraging me. Things were really moving and all I could do was focus on breathing and murmuring “Jesus” for help while hanging onto Torey.

My doula asked for the peanut ball and got me into a position that would help baby move along from what she was seeing on the monitor. The nurse and my doula were watching baby on the monitor and cueing me. And then…the pressure on my rectum came in full force and I couldn’t stop it. He was making his way down. I kicked the peanut ball away and moved onto all fours. Our OB and the other nurses came back in the room.

Lights went dark and my OB asked for spotlights from my stomach down.

I squeezed Torey’s back and couldn’t bring myself to let him go. He was supposed to catch baby but my grip couldn’t break. My body was pushing. It was an uncontrollable feeling. My OB and nurses encouraged me at one point to push longer. Each push my doula was giving me the seconds to continue to push through. I focused on the seconds and feeling of pushing to make it last or push longer. Every single push and second I remembered it was that much closer to seeing my baby. I was on all fours but I felt like I needed to change positions, and I went to side lying on my left side. A push came and I went with it, and I couldn’t help but push with my grunting coming out of me. My OB said “go lower when you yell out and push on the next one”. Another feeling came and my doula counted and said “push low, keep going” while counting. Each time, I could hear my OB and nurses saying “Good job. Keep going sis! He’s right there!” Our doula finished counting after the wave of ejecting was subsiding but I knew I could push longer and kept pushing. I did the same thing again once I felt my body cue to push again, and the next thing I knew, Liam came out crying and they put him on my chest.

It took 13 minutes of pushing.

I’ll never forget it. My baby was in my arms. I did it. I actually did that. It was so empowering. It was the hardest thing I had ever done, and at the same time, the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. The pushing, the contractions, they were over and I had him finally. I was struck with emotions but I couldn’t shed a tear but I felt so emotional holding him. Liam came out of the womb to Why by Elevation Worship. Holding him while the worship music was still playing felt like a dream. It was complete bliss in the midst of being a complete bloody wreck down there.

November 30th, 2023

Torey was holding both of us and I looked up at him and we both were in awe. Sheer awe of what just happened, seeing our baby for the first time, and our lives completely changing forever. We finally had our miracle, eight pounds and four ounces, twenty and a half inches long — Liam Manu Jenkins was born.