My Postpartum Journey, So Far.
Every mom goes through something after giving birth. You’re not alone. Mine just happens to be chronic hip and back pain.
Becoming pregnant and preparing for birth, I didn’t think too much about postpartum. If I’m being honest, I think I went into thinking that I’d be better in this season than I currently am.
I had to grow up fast as a kid and take care of my brother when he was born. My stepmom went through complications during birth and landed her in the hospital for over a year and a half. My dad would go to the hospital after work and my older sister and I were left to tend to our new baby brother. It was a lot of juggling with my baby brother in the hospital with my stepmom and her mom throughout the day and then my sister and I to take over after we were done with school. Some days we had to miss school. I remembered it being so much work. I was so tired all the time and under pressure and a lot of responsibility — getting groceries, making meals, cleaning, making formula bottles, changing diapers, soothing a baby to sleep, getting up at night to feed or rock back to sleep, installing car seats, and getting diaper bags together.
It was the same when my parents had another baby. Except this time I was in high school and my older sister was on her way to college. It was my responsibility of taking care of a newborn and a toddler (3 years old). It took a huge toll.
Basically the word “postpartum” when I was pregnant was familiar to me and I felt like I had a handle on taking care of a baby after birth. What I would find out is that taking care of myself after birth would be a new learning lesson.
In my experience, doctors visits kept telling me about resources for PPD (postpartum depression), but what was never mentioned was the numerous variables of what a woman can go through after birth other than PPD. Things like arthritis… yeah right?! I felt like a truck had run over my body. I felt so weak, fragile and sore. I was also on the verge of experiencing mastitis, an infection in your breast that can happen when you’re breastfeeding. I went to the doctors and the nurse practitioner had told me I was probably still experiencing arthritis coupled with symptoms of what could be mastitis.
Not only that, but the hip and back pain onset during my third trimester, which I started going to physical therapy for during that time for pain relief, did not get better after birth. The pain was getting increasingly worse week after week, which by the six week checkup I was told the pain should’ve been doing the opposite and getting better because the baby was out and my body was in it’s healing phase.
I started going to pelvic floor physical therapy to address my pain. I’m still doing weekly treatments of this now. I also went to multiple orthopedists and a physiatrist. Ive gotten X-ray of my hip and low back and an MRI of my sacrum and low back. I’ve gotten remarks from doctors,
“I can’t fix you.”
“It doesn’t matter if we see the problem in an image, your recovery would be the same…It would just take time and doing what you’re doing now.”
“There’s injections that we can refer you to in order to manage the pain.”
“You should’ve been referred to ____ by your OB.”
“Imaging they tested for wouldn’t show anything there since the main sustaining areas of pain and inflammation has been ___ muscles and area.”
“You should try ___…”
“Your back…still?”
“It’s a slow process.”
I’ve now understood what people with chronic pain go through.
You’re in a type of pain that no one understands or sees. You’re not in a visible cast or have a surface wound to show, so you’re seen as capable or just completely misunderstood. They don’t get why you’re not better yet, and you don’t have an answer yourself either.
A level of pain that has surpassed supplements and your first response doctors. You’re on a journey of research and trial and error constantly. It’s like an ongoing study on yourself. Always searching for an answer to your pain, and an answer to resolve it all.
Before and during pregnancy, I lived an active life. Surfing twice a week, going to the gym four times, running twice a week, and doing yoga once a week. All of this combined with walking and biking to and from work or to do errands. I kept this up during pregnancy until my second trimester and just did walking for commuting and skipped surfing and running for other workouts, but still kept up with 4-5 times a week of activity.
I also gave birth with no pain intervention. No Tylenol or ibuprofen even. I can handle pain.
I find being active how I cope with things and also what I find to be my enjoyment of things that fill my cup.This season I can’t reach for the activities that I would normally go to do.
What I am doing is the exercises recommended after my weekly pelvic floor physical therapy sessions, walking (on a “good” day), and trying to keep up with my baby. And even these activities leave me in pain and soreness that I make me feel defeated at times.
I’m currently also doing Rolfing. A structural integration method that’s focused on elongating fascia so that your organs can sit better in your body.
Red light therapy also, which is supposed to have many benefits, including helping people with chronic pain.
Contrast therapy, which starts with heating your body in a sauna for 10-15 minutes, and then you move to a cold plunge bath for 2-6 minutes. This is to help the body with pain from inflammation.
Lymphatic drainage massage using wood tools on myself through learning the methodology, to help relieve toxins or fluids in your body to your lymph nodes and help with inflammation, along with other benefits.
Pelvic band or also known as SI (sacroiliac) belt, which provides counter pressure on the area and relieve pain that can help you function better and be mobile with less pain.
Postpartum wrap, which also provides counter pressure for my abdomen to help with the diastisis recti (separation of the abdomen lining) and take some pressure off of my back in order for my back to stabilize.
Chiropractic treatments with the right doctor. I went through too many chiropractors that made things worse. I now only go to Dr. Cara Olsen on Maui and The Chiropractic Studio in Pearl City. Chronic back pain I feel like puts a huge spotlight on the level of expertise a person is in their field, because I have felt every wrong move and have to pay the price for it.
Changing to footwear specific to helping people with back injuries has been a game changer. I got fitted at Runners Route and given a few options to try and found new shoes that feel so comfortable and help me walk and carry on longer running errands and what not. My gait feels better too.
I’ve also started seeing a doctor who specializes in conditions such as Pelvic Floor Dysfunction, Connective Tissue Disorders, Traumatic injuries, and Orthopedic Injuries. I hope that this continues to be a good fit and see even more improvements. I’ll share more on this later if this seems to be helpful.
My hope and prayer of course is for my pain to be resolved and to return to being my active self again but this time enjoying them with my baby. Walking on the beach, dipping in and out of the water, longer walks, biking, surfing…a girl can dream.
But I also want to share what I’m going through, my story in maybe the chance of another mom that’s up at night researching what she’s going through and trying to find answers, some sort of hope.
A search result that goes somewhere in leading her towards not feeling alone, and maybe finding some relevance to be able to feel like she can make it another day. Maybe the things that are finding me relief will help her too.
I want to give moms the empathy and support to know that even if they’re not going through what I am, whatever they are going through after birth, they are not alone. I found that with talking to other new moms that gave birth around the same time I did, we all went through so many different things, and sharing it didn’t change obviously what we went through or going through, but it did change feeling like we were alone in it. Just because something isn’t talked about commonly, doesn’t mean it isn’t valid.
I hope the next post about my postpartum journey is one that shares the light at the end of the tunnel — all the fun things I’ve been able to do with my family. But in the meantime, I hope this reaches to someone who needs to know they’re not alone in this season. I’m praying and believing there’s resolve and a new chapter of redemption in all of this.